I stopped taking my medications 7 days ago. I am working on getting pregnant so that doctor advised me that I cannot take my medications during the first trimester of pregnancy. So instead of flipping out then and putting stress on the baby I decided to see how I would respond to it now and [...]
SHE DOES CRACK
- A release to sustain my momentum towards clarity, truth, and acceptance.
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10/29/11 What do you do when you just want to…
What do you do when all you want to do is fucking scream? My life is so different than it was a year ago hell then it was 4 months ago. Fuck bipolar that shit is easy…..try raising a family that includes a 16 year old and two dogs. I feel fucking old and tired [...]
October 29, 2011
Categories: Uncategorized . Tags: bipolar, bipolar disorder, bipolar I, bipolar II, death, dep, depression, dying, mania, Manic, manic depressive, sadness, sober, suicide . Author: shedoescrack . Comments: Leave a Comment
3-11-11
The end has come to my anxiety! My doctor called and I am cancer free! Thank god waiting for a call to find out if you have cancer fucking sucks! I never want to go through that shit again. So what I was told instead was that I have two elevated Liver Enzyme levels due [...]
March 11, 2011
Categories: bipolar, bipolar disorder, depression, manic depressive . Tags: bipolar, bipolar disorder, bipolar I, bipolar II, death, depression, dying, mania, Manic, manic depressive, suicide . Author: shedoescrack . Comments: 1 Comment
1/16/11
I’ve been so bad about blogging. It is really true what they say about depression – it breeds so much passion and ability to be creative and fill the pages. Since I last wrote I have moved to Hollywood. In fact I moved this weekend. I am exhausted but so happy I don’t have words [...]
January 16, 2011
Categories: Uncategorized . Tags: bipolar, bipolar disorder, bipolar I, bipolar II, death, depression, dying, mania, Manic, manic depressive, sadness, sober, suicide . Author: shedoescrack . Comments: 1 Comment
11/21/2010
Life has become one normal day after another. I used to wonder what that was like, a normal day…now I know. Now I know what it is like again. I’d forgotten what it was to have a succession of normal days. It’s funny how such a small amount of “bad” time in comparison to your [...]
November 21, 2010
Categories: bipolar, bipolar disorder, depression, manic depressive, Uncategorized . Tags: bipolar, bipolar disorder, bipolar I, bipolar II, death, depression, dying, mania, Manic, manic depressive, sadness, sober, suicide . Author: shedoescrack . Comments: Leave a Comment
10/26/10
What an insane month!!!!!! My work purchased another agency so I have been immersed in the assistance of a smooth transition. I’ve been going into work at 5am, not taking a lunch and not going home until 5pm. I thought I would be able to go to bed at 8:30 but there are things to [...]
October 26, 2010
Categories: Uncategorized . Tags: bipolar, bipolar disorder, bipolar I, bipolar II, death, depression, dying, mania, Manic, manic depressive, sadness, sober, suicide . Author: shedoescrack . Comments: Leave a Comment
10/2/2010
So yesterday was my 39th birthday. My girlfriend surprised me by taking the day off and coming up to spend it with me. It was a day of simple pleasures. My favorite breakfast place. My favorite strawberry cookies. A poem she gave me signed by the author. A day filled with kisses and hugs and [...]
October 2, 2010
Categories: Uncategorized . Tags: bipolar, bipolar disorder, bipolar I, bipolar II, death, depression, dying, mania, Manic, manic depressive, sadness, sober, suicide . Author: shedoescrack . Comments: 1 Comment
8/27/10
I’ve been so bad with writing. I need to set a diary reminder to make sure I get back here more. I found it easier to write when things were going bad. Ok so I had another vacation where things went great and when I came no craziness ensued. In the past returning from a [...]
August 27, 2010
Categories: bipolar, bipolar disorder, depression, manic depressive, Uncategorized . Tags: bipolar, bipolar disorder, bipolar I, bipolar II, death, depression, dying, mania, Manic, manic depressive, sadness, sober, suicide . Author: shedoescrack . Comments: Leave a Comment
8/10/10
Wow I didn’t realize how long it had been since I had entered a post. Things are still going really well. I still have not gotten back to the gym but I am still pretty active. I am handling stress really well. Work has been stressful. I am in part-time sales and the economy is [...]
August 10, 2010
Categories: Uncategorized . Tags: bipolar, bipolar disorder, bipolar I, bipolar II, death, depression, dying, mania, Manic, manic depressive, sadness, sober, suicide . Author: shedoescrack . Comments: Leave a Comment
7/26/10 – I’m Back
I am back from my work/vacation from Texas. The entire trip went off without a hitch. I did get pills from my doctor for the flight up and back and did take them because why even deal with the anxiety if I do not have too. The pills do not make me feel drugged out [...]
July 26, 2010
Categories: Uncategorized . Tags: bipolar, bipolar disorder, bipolar I, bipolar II, death, depression, dying, mania, Manic, manic depressive, sadness, sober, suicide . Author: shedoescrack . Comments: 1 Comment
The Daily Reviewer Selects the Top 100 BIPOLAR Blogs and I made the List!!!!
- My inexhaustible mind filled with ubiquitous thoughts of death reminds me that I am living on borrowed time.
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